Qualifications to Listen

A mistake I have made consistently is putting people in positions they were never equipped to be in. I have tried to put people who are assignments in friendship roles, and because of that I have left feeling drained and disappointed. Not fully understanding why I felt disappointed or drained, when I knew God gave me grace to be in this person’s life. God led me to some critical points through multiple failure in these situations.  Here’s some things I learned from that situation and similar situations.


1. Is the person you’re about to share information with qualified and equipped to be a listener to handle that information?

This is a question I now ask myself before I release information to the person I’m speaking to. I could be selfishly putting weight on that person, they’re not equipped to handle by the information I’m providing. The same way I wouldn’t discuss bills with my 3 year old son because he’s not equipped to handle that information, I should be this intentional in sharing information with people who aren’t positioned and assigned to handle that information properly. 


I had to realized I was perverting assignments by attempting to make them friendships. Assignments are usually people who are there for a season, and in that season God places us in these people’s life to build them up spiritually or usher them into salvation and a spiritual relationship with God through his son Jesus Christ. We must understand an assignment may not be a friendship; yet, a friendship has an assignment.


2. I can’t control anyone, but I can cultivate the relationship with my response.

Once I have distinguished the person is an assignment, I can’t go in with the mindset of expecting them to do what I say. I’m there to cultivate the relationship to allow the Holy Spirit to lead them. There’s a different between cultivating and manipulating. Manipulating is doing something to control or to obtain the desired response; cultivating is breaking through or planting to grow the desired response. It isn’t our responsibility to dictate a response to but to create and cultivate the atmosphere for the correct one.